My work as a Medium often involves counseling between the Spirits of the Living & those of the Dead. This is in part due to the fact that humans are complicated beings, with deep emotions and complex personalities. People often die with unfinished business; relationships that were never truly mended and problems left unsolved. Sometimes there are even unresolved issues around the death itself.
The story I tell today is one that truly touched my heart. It has been a complex one of heartache, healing & reincarnation. I was first introduced to the Spirit of *James (not his real name) when his mother came to one of my Seances. He had passed away unexpectedly, under controversial circumstances. Not only was his death unresolved, there had also been a lot of heavy feelings between him and the family who loved him. He had lived his life on the edge and had a lot of emotional problems. As we all know life is complicated…love is easy, but getting along-not so much. It is particularly hard when watching someone we love spin out of control. If this person dies while still spinning recklessly out of control it is difficult for the family to find peace. The soul of the departed also finds this challenging as they see how their family suffers. Not because they are being punished, but because they have to sit and watch how their actions effected others. I refer to this as ‘Time Out’.
When souls have a lot to reflect on (unresolved issues), they are put in ‘Time Out’. I see it kind of like putting a naughty kid into the ‘Time Out’ Chair. They have to sit aside from the world and think about their actions. This is not just so they can see how they were bad or wrong, but also so they can see how much others truly care for them and how their actions contribute to the world around them. A Spirit in ‘Time Out’ is being placed their to heal. As a general rule the Spirits who most often land in ‘Time Out’ are the ones who have died with a lot of emotional problems. Suicides, accidental overdose/drug addiction, violent deaths & people with deep seeded emotional issues often need this time of healing that ‘Time Out’ provides. I would like to state clearly that this is not a place of punishment, but a place of healing.
*James was in ‘Time Out’, he was spending his time seeing how his life, death and actions effected his family and those who loved him. His meeting with his Mother through Spirit Communication was deeply emotional for both him and her. She attended a few more Seances; each bringing them both further onto the healing path. As the Mother began to heal she told her family of her experiences and soon I was seeing other family members who also felt the need to connect with James. Over a period of years I was present as James connected with more and more of his family. With each visit he healed more and more. Realizing how deeply he was loved, and that his family truly understood his suffering and remembered the beautiful soul he was vital to his healing. Then something interesting happened. He began to talk about joining his family again. At Seances he would make references to reincarnation and how he was getting ready to be reborn. The more family he connected to in Spirit, the stronger he became and the more whole his soul. When a member of the family became pregnant (something I did not know) he announced to his family at a Seance that he would be born soon and even shared with them whose family he would be born into. That child was born last year and James family has spoken to me of unusual behaviors the child displays that are so similar to their brother. It is important in cases like this not to make it happen. Not to refer to the child by the name of the Beloved Dead or push behaviors on them, instead it is about watching the story unfold.
What I appreciate most about this particular tale is the LOVE. The family was so dedicated to helping their brother/son heal. When they realized their interactions with him, was vital to his healing…they became truly invested in the work. They shared their love with him, expressed their feelings of forgiveness and showed that they were still his family. Many of us have family members who are lost, even self destructive. It is a very hard thing to live with; watching someone you love be hurtful to themselves and others. In my experience I have found that some people just cannot distance themselves from their emotions enough to heal while living. That being said, it is nice to know that the healing process continues in the afterlife. Emotions are dampened and sometimes more approachable at that point. I am a firm believer in doing as much healing as we can while still alive, for it truly is easier. But should you loose someone dear to you, who suffered much in this life…know that they are still able to heal. I hope you enjoyed the read folks.