Wake up Calls…

I feel tired today.  I feel like I want to cry.  The tears welling up inside me cannot be pushed down or told to go away, for they are made of deep, lonely, heartbreaking things, filled with fear, confusion, and grief.  The emotions that fill me are not mine alone, but the coagulated smeg of a culture staring at its own poor decisions.

I don’t feel this way often, as for the most part, I am an optimist.  I believe I knew what I was getting into when I signed on for this ‘tour of duty’ or ‘life’ as it is more often put, but there are days when even my sunshiny viewpoint is obscured with ‘what if’s’ & ‘what the fucks’; times when I wonder what the point of it all is and whether we can change anything or are just here to watch the ship go down.

I know this is not the usual inspiring words you are expecting to hear from me, the ones that put you at ease and make you feel like things will turn out ok in the end.  But it is important to see all sides of the story, and in a sense feel all sides of it.  We can’t deny our fear for denying it is a fool’s game, it keeps us from seeing what we are truly up against.

We are living in changing times, we have reached a point where you have to be a complete idiot to not believe in Climate Change/Disruption.  I mean today 5′ of snow, hail & ice fell in Mexico…in July!  We see signs of it every day on the television, the internet and in our own worlds, and on a shared emotional wavelength we are all scared.

So what do we do?

In moments of my life when I feel afraid I hear my fathers voice speaking to me in my head.  He is usually saying one of two things…“Bravery is going forward in the face of fear”, or “You don’t want to go down like a punk”.  The first has a response saying “Having no fear makes you a fool”.  The second statement was my dad’s way of saying ‘we don’t give up!’  I think about these things often, and know that I chose my father well even if some of the lessons were less then pleasant.  He taught me what it meant to be a warrior, to be a person of strength, and how to stand tall even when the odds were against me.  After all, if you’re going to go down, go down knowing you did everything in your power to stay up.

We are not living without hope, for the thing about impending doom is that it creates genius!

Along with all the horrific things flashed through our news feeds each day there are other less noticeable things happening, things that are not getting as much attention as they should. The news channels don’t want to cover inspiring stories, because the advertisers won’t get as much compulsive spending out of viewers watching pieces on  how oyster farming is growing in popularity; due to the amount of carbon they pull from the water, or how they are extracting carbon from the air in Iceland and transforming it into Basalt (rock).  The truth is, fearful things unsettle us to the point that we seek comfort in whatever way we can, often through unhealthy choices such as drug use, excessive shopping, gambling, etc.  Fear is big business…

When we focus our lens on what we can do…reuse, reduce, recycle, conserve, grow, share, educate, pray, meditate, etc.  we stop feeling quite as hopeless.  On the days like today where I feel like I don’t want to look at the positive, I sit with it, acknowledge my feelings and then ask myself what I plan on doing with those fears.  I then remember my father’s stories of standing up with half his face blown off, fighting his way to a helicopter and safety.  I remember stories told by my grandmother of living through the depression; lying under piles of blankets with her children when there was hardly any food and not much for heat.  I remember moments in my own life when I thought I would lose my house during the housing market collapse, and I remember that in all of those moments there was nothing to do for any of us, then keep on doing our best to survive, have hope and thrive.

My husband is a stoic kind of guy, and his view is also comforting in its own way.  He often says ‘God doesn’t care about our comfort, he/she is more concerned with our character’.  This quote is another I repeat when I feel the weight by hard times.  I focus on the character of a person I want to be.  Who do I want to be remembered as?  If I were a fictional character in a book, how would I want to act, do, be in any given situation?  It helps me get out of feeling sorry for myself and makes me realize I am living in exciting times, times that will be hard no-doubt, but times when wonders can be made and our actions matter.  Seeing myself as a hero/heroine in my own story empowers me.

Do not give up hope, do not turn to vices that make your life harder.  Yes, it’s hard, but there are things we can do to help us regulate our emotions and thoughts far more efficiently than habits that create more problems.  This is the time to pick up all our old tricks; go back to our yoga mat, sit in meditation, walk in the woods, sing, dance, create sacred art, tell stories, create daily rituals that keep us aware in this time of change.  We must focus our minds, create networks of like-minded people, get to know our farmers, healers, builders, thinkers, and spiritual leaders.  We need to become the co-creators we were intended to be, for that is where our salvation truly lies.   We are powerful beyond our belief. If we were to focus collectively on healing ourselves and our planet, we would see miracles.  We need to become unified, not torn apart by our ‘differences’, for the truth of the matter is we all share one thing in common, we are Earthlings.  WE NEED TO WAKE UP!

Becoming a co-creator in one’s own life starts with focusing our mind.  We need to really think about what matters to us, what world we want to see, and then put ourselves into it whole-heartedly.  Quantum physics has proven that thought matters, that what we focus on we draw to us.  I like to put it this way…when we spend our time thinking about what we do not want to happen, it’s like we are standing at the lunch-counter of life ordering it.

Right now, most of us spend many hours a day with a low-level feeling of fear and anxiety, often fueled by the media.  Looking at it this way, it’s easy to see how we feel hopeless, defeated and doomed.  We are telling ourselves this every day, enforcing it with the help of media every time we turn on the television or look at our newsfeed.  We should not blind ourselves to the truth of our world, but we need to make sure the ‘truth’ we are viewing gives us the whole picture, not just the profitable one fueled by fear. We also have to stop using convenience as an excuse not to do our part.  If you’re not recycling, reducing, reusing because it’s too much work, you might want to think about how much work we will have if we don’t start doing our part.  This is the kind of procrastination we cannot afford.

I do not want to leave you with a feeling of doom or despair, I want you to think about where your emotions and feelings really lie.  I want you to ask yourself what you are doing to make it better; no matter how small of an act, it all adds up.  I want you to join me in helping others wake up.  I want you to cocreate hope with me.  I want you to remember that like me, you chose to come in at this time and be a co-creator in a time when the world really needs us.  After all…who wants to go down like a punk?

 

spreading love-salicrow

Stories of Spirit…The Holidays [boundaries, new traditions & self care]

I love the holiday season.  I love the lights, the music, and the holiday cheer.  I do not like expectations, over-doing, and giving for the sake of ‘have to’.  I gave all of that up a long time ago.

About 15 years ago I had a major opening to Spirit which I refer to as ‘the November Incident’.  It was so all-consuming that it takes up two chapters in my book Jump Girl, the initiation, and art of a Spirit Speaker.  (release date-2/13/2018).

https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/562306/jump-girl-by-salicrow/9781623171926/

During the November Incident, the world of spirit opened to me so intensely that I had a hard time keeping up with my daily life; let alone performing the holiday magic I had done for so many years.  I even struggled with being present at my favorite holiday party; spending 15 minutes locked in the bathroom, trying to regain a sense of center.

Now, I understand that the shamanic opening I experienced during the November Incident is far outside of the normal range.  But all the same, it taught me that I like many people do way too much during the holiday season.  We run around in a hubbub of ribbons, candy and shopping centers, filling our obligatory list of buying, visiting and celebration.  But the pace that most of us keep at this time, and the to-do list we create for ourselves has a tendency to suck any holiday spirit we may have from our tired, over-stimulated souls.

During the November Incident, I was forced to slow down.  I did not have the mental capacity, nor the physical energy for hours of shopping, nor did I have the focus to withstand hours of holiday parties I didn’t really want to be at.  Instead, I chose to slow down, do less, spend less, and be more present.  The functions I did attend, I did because I wanted to.  The gifts I gave came from my heart.  I stopped the bullshit of ‘I need to have something for everyone’, and chose instead to give of myself.

Many years have passed since Spirit ripped the veil from my sight, but the holiday traditions I chose at my time of opening are the ones I continue today.  I have stepped away from shopping malls, and ridiculous baking list, instead choosing to spend time with people I love.  I send Yule cards instead of buying gifts, some are real with my handwritten blessings inscribed on paper, some of virtual, but they all mean something.  My gift giving list has been greatly reduced, as I feel we all have way too much as it is, and no one needs me to buy them a cheese slicer with matching knife set.

My opening gave me permission to stop doing.  I was able to step back from the obligation that the holiday season has become and found in it the feeling of happiness, and celebration I knew as a child.  I love coffee dates with old friends, holiday music playing on the radio, and I love the lights & greenery.  I do not want presents, and specifically ask my children and family members not to give me gifts, unless they felt a deep calling to do so.  To my children and grandchildren, I give gifts of things they need, like tires, car batteries, bed sheets, and socks.  When it comes to toys I choose wisely, I ask myself if they will still enjoy it after the ribbons, bows, paper, and sugar have worn off.

When approaching the holidays this year I suggest you ask yourself a few questions.  “Do I want to do this?”,  “Will my item be appreciated, or am I just buying for the sake of giving?”, “What do I need?”  “What do the people on my list need?”, “How do I want to celebrate this year?”

Traditions are not just something from the past that we must recreate.  They all came from somewhere, at some point they were new, fun and worth repeating.  Which means we can create new traditions now, traditions that fit our lifestyle and beliefs.  We can choose to have a tree or decorate a houseplant.  We can choose to not decorate at all.  We can choose to eat pizza for Christmas dinner instead of holiday hams and hours of cooking.  We can designate a pajama holiday instead of a fancy dress event.  We can choose to be happy for the holidays instead of overstressed, sugar bombed and broke.

My work with the Beloved Dead has shown me that we do not give a flying-fuck what we got for Christmas from Grandma when we were 8.  What we remember is the house filled with laughter, the smell of yummy food, and the feeling of love.  We remember emotions, events, and silly stories.  So go out and make memories that feel good.  Stop doing what others expect, create new boundaries that keep you happy and healthy during the holiday season, and remember to spread love.  It’s what it’s all about folks.

spreading love-salicrow

Stories of Spirit…Between the Worlds [the spirits of november]

November has long been a month of profound spiritual growth for me.  It was over 15 years ago that I had my major opening to Spirit, or at least when it seemed to hit its full force ‘You may be fucking crazy Sali’ momentum.  I had seen spirits since I was a very young girl, and was pretty comfortable with the thought, thanks to the early teaching of Grammy Brown.  But what began days after Halloween when I was 30 was more like some kind of special forces boot-camp for mediums.  It was powerful and often overwhelming.  It is also why I named my upcoming book ‘Jump Girl’, for I have always chosen the most direct route, with little regards for ‘easy’

My walking the line of crazy, opening to spirit moment was planned, something the team of spirits I work with reminded me of constantly.  What more it was planned by me.  Every mind-bending experience through time and space, every hold onto what reality you can, kundalini opening, every spirit sitting in me experience was drawn up ahead of time by ME.  After successfully passing whatever test I was taking, one of my trusted spirit companions would come forward and gently remind me that this had been my idea, that I had specifically planned to be tested the hard way.  I knew what they said to be true, for as they said it I recognized myself in the design.

A few years back I had a Soul-Level astrological Reading done by Marcella Eversole.  The things she spoke of in my Reading rang true, many of what she was telling me I was already implementing in my life.  As she finished my Reading she told me ‘You couldn’t have planned your chart better for the work you are here to do’.  This too rang as truth in my mind.

Every year when November circles back around, I find myself revisiting the Novembers that have passed since ‘the November Incident’ (a title that takes up two chapters in my book).  In my reverence, I want to step back from the world of the living and slip deeply into the warm coziness of my small home with its woodstove and quiet.  I  think of how thankful I am that my shamanic journey happened before the days of social media so that my bat-shit nuts crazy went relatively unnoticed by the outside world.  I am most thankful for the support of those who knew me well, that they could recognize that I was not mentally ill, but that something else was happening.

Waking up to Spirit, whether you have worked with it your whole life or not, is challenging.  In truth, the November Incident lasted for 4 months.  Four months of me wondering if I was ever going to feel normal again, four months of my body having spontaneous moments of convulsion as energy moved through my Kundalini, cleaning out all the old blocks in my Chakra system.  Four months of looking at all the things that hurt me. four months of looking at myself under a microscope.

I have long ago adjusted to the new level of spiritual connection in my life, in fact, it was my team of spirits that insisted that I begin doing Spirit Communication for the public.  They insisted that it was the work I had intended to do this lifetime.  At first, this seemed unbelievable as I had been working as a Psychic; looking into people’s lives and futures, for many years. But they spoke the truth, the real work I had intended for this lifetime was in communication…speaking to the unseen world and helping the living to find solace with death and an acceptance of an after life.

The November Incident; my opening of consciousness, took place over a decade ago.  I have adjusted to the point where that which had rocked my world is now my normal.  In doing so, in jumping into the deep waters I have worked really hard to find the way to the shallows, so that I may be a guide to others who are being tried by the boundaries of spiritual reality.  We are opening as a people and for many, this is a painful experience.  When our consciousness expands we must first look at ourselves, with a deep and penetrating lense.  We must look at that which we are ashamed of, the things we have done and that have been done to us, that hold pain.  This is where our power lies, our personal power lies in accepting the events that have made up our past, and choosing to use those events as teachers that strengthen us, instead of allowing ourselves to be continuously abused by them.

The dark months of winter are powerful.  The quiet and isolation that snow and cold carry naturally turn us inward, inviting us to explore the hidden recesses of our soul.  Do not be afraid to look.  We all have shadows, we all have parts of our personality we rather not acknowledge, and we have all been wounded.  You do not have to go at your shadow like a monster hunter, instead choose to be kind to yourself in the process…long baths, journalling, and good friends help.  That and Tulsi Rose Tea, and some Rose Quartz, and Reiki.

We are becoming that which we were intended to be…all of us.  We came into this world to evolve and grow, we can do so with fear and hesitation or we can do so with curiosity and a brisk stride…Tally Ho’ you know!

 

For those of you interested in the tales of my shamanic tight-rope journey through the November Incident my book ‘JUMP GIRL, the Initiation & Art of a Spirit Speaker’ comes out in February.  It is available for pre-order https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/562306/jump-girl-by-salicrow/9781623171926/

spreading love-salicrow

Sacred Travel…It’s all about the Underwear [packing for adventure]

I got a surprise yesterday, when I realized that the 29th of September was on Tuesday, not Wednesday.  For the last week or so, I have been telling myself that I was heading back to Ireland on Wednesday, the 29th.  With this in mind, I planned a leisurely lead-up to my departure…I was going to take it slow and easy.  Who was I trying to kid?

Hennaing my hair w/my fox hat on. Last minute self-care before Sacred Travel.

I have been running on squirrel power all day, getting things in order &  shuffling the the mild chaos, that seems to appear anytime I am getting ready for spiritual adventure.

The chaos is something we must all expect, if we are going to step out of our ordinary life, and into the world of the sacred.  It’s like breaking through a wall of bullshit, that’s designed to keep us on the worn path we call normal.

I find that if one relaxes into the chaos, it can be transformed into the stuff of magic, one that weaves a story that is truly worthy of the term sacred.

Spiritual Adventure…sacred travel is something that makes my heart sing.  It is exhilarating to flow in the slipstream of reality.  My mind feels expansive and fluid and my pulse races, as I deeply connect to the truth of my existence.  When I step out of ‘my ordinary’, I step big.  I experience reality as a multi-faceted thing, in which I dance back and forth between now & then…lifetimes happening at once.

Back to getting things organized…

This journey to Ireland is deeply connected to the Morrigan; a Celtic warrior goddess of death, magic and prophesy, whom I have had a close relationship with for decades.  In fact the she is the first goddess I ever worked with, and our relationship spans more then 20 years.  She is a raven/crow, triple goddess, and she is not exactly mild mannered.

The trip she has me on, is a bit unusual.  With my husband as my traveling companion, I will be traveling here and there, about Ireland and Northern Ireland primarily by bus.  My plan is to create a trip that people could do without having to rent a car/drive on the other side of the road, and to do it relatively inexpensively.  On our journey we will be staying in various accommodations…renting a room in someones home (airbnb), staying in a downtown hotel, a hostel, and at the home of a very generous friend a clients.  We will climb mountains, visit the sea, and sacred monoliths along the way.

Seeing how we will be doing a lot of our travel by bus, my goal was to get our packing down to one carry-on piece of luggage each.  Here are some of my tips for doing so…

*wear a nice pair of boots…the right boots can be worn while trekking through the countryside & out dancing

*pack enough underwear for the entire trip…no one wants to be washing their undies in the sink half way through the trip…*choose versatile clothing…particularly in dark colors, as they hide dirt better.  go for light weight pieces that can be layered*…*one or two super-cute pieces that can be worn to for going out at night*…*go light on the accessories…wear the same jewelry the whole trip, a couple of scarves*…*wear your jacket, choose a good windbreaker*

Well, I am off for the night, going to wash the henna out of my hair and get on with the evening.  I leave tomorrow for the land of my ancestors.

spreading love-salicrow

 

Stories of Spirit…Opening to Spirit [expanding consciousness]

I was teaching a class on the energetic working of Runes, last Sunday, when I found myself saying “and then I open myself to Spirit”.  It is a statement I have made hundreds, if not thousands of times.  This time, I realized as I looked at the students sitting in front of me, that what I said was akin to explaining what sex feels like, to someone who has never had it.  To any who have had it, it is easily recognizable.  But to those who have never experienced it, it is a glittering Christmas present; topped with paper and ribbons, sitting beneath the tree.  It is magical, mysterious, and unknown.

Opening oneself to Spirit, simply put means getting out of the way, so that the will of the divine universe can move through you.  It is about connecting to the strands of fate, that weave the pattern of ones life.  It speaks of being receptive to that which is unseen, and unknown.  It demands trust, faith, and surrender.

We are living in an age where spiritualism has become a commodity, something that anyone should be able to achieve if they buy the right crystals, eat the right food, and mediate regularly.  So this should be simple right? 

In reality expanding consciousness, and becoming more spiritual is a personal path.  No two people will get there in exactly the same way.  No amount of crystals, oils or potions can do it for you.  These things are tools, meant to be of assistance; to enhance the experience, but they cannot and will not bring the experience to you alone.  Teachers, techniques, and traditions are also valuable, but only if one is willing and able to release the desire to control every minute faction of their life.  There must be a willingness to be fluid, and a belief that we are part of something greater.  A closed vessel cannot be filled.

Faith is a tricksome thing.  In truth, I do not believe it is something that can be taught.  To have faith one has to choose to believe.  Religion can be indoctrinated, but the feeling of connection to the divine, the world around you, and a true sense of ones part in it,  is not something that can be done without first deciding you believe it is possible. We  must first surrender our walls, releasing the barriers that keep us locked into a reality consisting solely of what is solid, tangible, and documented.  Faith is something we can choose, just as we are able to choose what our favorite color is, and whether we like the taste of onions.  It is not something that is assigned, we are not allotted as those who are and are not spiritual.  We are all spiritual beings, but not all of us accept this as reality.

Releasing oneself to Spirit requires us to have faith, to believe that we are worthy and capable of feeling connected to the divine universe.

I am not sure at what point in human history, we began questioning our right to be part of the whole.  I have never felt unconnected, it is something I have always known to be true.  I admit, I fancy myself an old soul, and know I have done much of this before.  But I am not talking about individuals questioning their worthiness to be whole, but whole cultures.

We are taught from an early age, that we are unworthy.  Says the television, magazines, advertisements, movies, and billboards.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”  Marianne Williamson

Well that’s something to think on… Perhaps here is where the truth lies, we are afraid of our power, of how fantastic we truly are.  We are afraid to reach for our dreams and find ourselves gloriously, deliciously alive.  We are afraid that in truth we are co-creators of our world.  If that is so, if we are co-creators of our world, then by connecting to a higher power we are in fact surrendering to ourselves. We are giving over to the fate, that which was ours to begin with, this is what it means to be Wyrd (connected to Fate).

By opening to Spirit, we allow the strand of divine will that resides inside of us, to connect to the universal pattern, and it feels fantastic!  It has been described as Zen, for the body, mind and soul feel truly connected.  In such moments the chatter of the mind falls away.  The racing of the bodily functions seize to draw our attention, and we are at peace.  It feels in many ways like the state of consciousness we experience right before falling asleep, or after an orgasm.  In this state of mind & body wholeness, we are able to receive guidance, healing and often an expansion of consciousness.  Our mind is open to receiving information, allowing us to gain greater insight to ourselves, and the world we are part of.  This is where magic takes place.

 

This is part 1 of a blog series I am writing, I will be continuing this journey of the mind over the next few weeks.  I encourage you to share your opinions, questions and ponderings.

spreading love-salicrow

 

Stories of Spirit…Turning Down the Volume [healing after death]

As a Medium, I meet a lot of people after they are dead, and in doing so I often get to experience the wisdom they have gleaned after crossing into the world of Spirit.  People/souls do not stop growing and learning when their body stops functioning.  Death is not only a place of rest, but a place of healing and growth.  In death we review the lessons we have learned in life, from the vantage point of the observer.  We not only see our actions played out for us to review, but are able to see how we effected the world around us.  We can shift perspective to bear witness to how those around us loved us, and why those who hurt us, did so.

The idea of spending the afterlife reviewing the events of this life, can be daunting to some people.  If our life is one of pain and struggle the last thing we would ask of Death, would be to watch our life over and over again.  But the universe is kind, and we are not sentenced to review the experience in it’s emotional fullness.

One of the gifts of Death, is that is that the volume level of our emotions is turned down significantly.  

Imagine your emotions could be adjusted, like the volume on a stereo.  One is so low, that you really need to be paying attention to feel at all.  While, ten is so loud that the only thing we can do is experience our emotions.  Most people go through life with their emotional volume set at about 4-5, allowing them to experience things through their emotions, while still focusing on other things.  Some however, have the volume set way above the comfort level; around 7-10, and are forced to go through life with their emotions taking front stage, every moment.   Unfortunately, the volume in which we experience emotions in life is not easily adjusted.

Traumatic events can jar the volume control of our emotions, leaving many of us to walk through life with a concert of emotions distracting us, and overwhelming us.

I hesitate before continuing my writing, wondering if my words could somehow make people see death as a cozy alternative to life.  That people who struggle with their own world; their living existence, may find the idea of their emotions being turned down, an inviting option.  In fact the idea that my words may be misinterpreted almost made me trash this blog article completely.  I am a firm believer that people do their best healing while still alive, and that we have come into this existence to experience and grow.  When we cut our life short, we are often required to experience similar events in our next life, so that our consciousness may expand.  

Death is a place of review.  With the volume turned down, we can experience things that may have escaped us in life.  We become aware of the why of situations.  If we had an abusive parent, we are able to see the situation from their perspective.  Witnessing their struggle, self-hatred, and the abuse that they experienced.  We get the back story on every moment that effected us in life.  With the emotions turned down, we can look at these moments with clarity.  The experience being more like watching a show on television, then living it out as our story.  This perspective often gives people a better understanding of themselves.  They know what they could have done differently, as well as the key moments that triggered damage in their psyche.  This adjusted view of ones life, is more noticeable when a soul has had a while in deaths domain.

Another interesting fact, that should be noted, is that coming in contact with a Medium turns the volume back up again temporarily.  The Medium makes the experience of communication, more real or life like, for the dead.  This is why it is a good idea to give the Spirit a bit of time for healing, if they have died traumatically or by their own actions.  A good Medium will use their guides to intervene, or stand between them and the dead, in these cases.  When I work with Spirits that have experienced trauma in death (from another or themselves), my doorman Adam is a necessity.  He often stands between me and the Spirit, they speak to him, and he passes the message onto me.  This is a simple way of keeping the volume level in tact, for Spirits who are still deeply in their healing process.

The time in between lives, is when our Spirit heals and recaps the lessons of our last life, as well as the lives we have experienced thus far.  In death we become all that we are.  Becoming whole; all that we are,  helps a soul to heal and become more.  For we can add the experiences of the life we just lived to the mix of that which we have already been.  In death we exist as our ‘higher self’, the self that is us with all of its parts.  Every life time lived adds to that which we are, our heartaches and sorrows are just as important as our achievements and loves.

The soul is a complex thing, one that is ever evolving.  We need to be patient with ourselves, and patient with those who suffer in ways that we cannot understand.  Recognizing that people can feel emotions at different degrees of volume, helps us to comprehend how the same situation can effect different people, in dissimilar ways, providing insight in regards to depression and anxiety.

How can we learn to dial down our emotional response while living?

This is a tricky one, and there is no one answer for everyone.  I am not a psychiatrist, and by no means am I suggesting you step out of the care of your counselor, if you have one.  I am simply trying to shed some light onto the subject of emotional volume, as shown to me by the Dead.

Mediation is helpful…  Learning how to center ourselves when the world around us is moving really fast, and our emotions are screaming at us is invaluable.  I prefer to use Sound in my meditation, often focusing on my own voice as I  ‘tone’.  Vocal Toning is the extension of vocal sounds, particularly focused on the sound of vowels, and harmonics.  It is pretty simple and requires no choir skills.  Vowel sounds are considered sacred in many cultures.  Prolonged vocal toning has a peaceful effect on both the energetic and physical body.  (For all you local folks, interested in learning Sound Mediation, I offer a weekly class on Tuesday nights at my studio in Lyndonville, VT).

Whether you feel drawn to sound healing/mediation, or simple breath exercises, mediation is something that works better with practice.  The more often we do it, the more easily we can slip into its gentle, peaceful embrace.

Mantras work...Mantras are simple statements, we repeat in order to create interpersonal change.  They work best if kept to 4-5 words.  When the stress of the world ways heavy on your brain, and your mind is spinning on its personal hamster wheel from hell, simply repeat your mantra 5 or 6 times.  Example…I am at peace with myself.  When you do, you will find your mind pauses, steps away from the hamster wheel for a moment.  The thoughts that haunt you will come back, but again go to your mantra, repeating it over and over again until your mind finds its quiet place.  The more often you handle your mind-fuck with the simple compassion of a mantra, the less often it will come around.

The biggest lesson I have learned from the Dead, is that life is worth living.  When we die, we miss the simple things of life…the taste of our favorite food, the smell of our favorite flowers, the color of the sky, the richness of textures we feel through touch, the embrace of our lovers and friends.  These are the things that come up, over and over again when I connect with the dead, even the ones who suffered in life.

spreading love-salicrow

Stories of Spirit…Why I Choose Love [lessons I have learned from the dead]

I use to be afraid of the dark.  Not the dark of a bedroom with no lights on; but the dark outside the ring of the campfire & street lights.  I was afraid of the unknown that lurked in the shadow of civilization.   

This fear, was something I purposely worked with as an adult.  I remember moving to Newark, and forcing myself to go sit alone in my front yard in the darkness.  My heart would beat rapidly and my mind would race, as I imagined being feasted upon by unseen forces; such as coyotes, bears and crazy half humans.  I knew my fear was imagined, yet there it was.  Loosing my fear of darkness was something that came to me in stages; like riding a bike.  I strategically faced my fear; first sitting in the field alone in the dark, then finding my way through the woods by moonlight.  I was afraid at every step of the way, but as I faced my fear; looking it straight in the eye, I gained inner strength & the fear lost it’s power of me.

We are living in a world entrenched in fear; fear that seeps into every nook and cranny of our being.  We fear the neighbor we do not know, the police officer, the politician, the person who doesn’t look like us, the person who does.  We fear not having enough, loosing our homes, losing the ones we love, we fear flying, driving, walking, eating, and even god.

But let me ask you this…What good does all this fear do?  Does it help you sleep better at night, does it make you happier, safer, less vulnerable?  Like my fear of wild things in the dark of night, it has no benefit.  I was not made safer from my fear, nor was my life enriched in any way, shape or form.

One of the things that helped me face my fear; was the knowledge that I was not truly alone.  I may be the only physical body walking through the darkened woods, or sitting under the clouded night sky in my field, but I was not alone.  I had the Spirits of my Ancestors and Loved Ones to accompany me.   None of us are truly alone.  We all have Spirit guides who accompany us, and support us; often trying to make contact and let us know they walk beside us.  I am blessed that as a Medium, I have the fortune of proof.

When we live with the reality; that our Soul exist after Death, fear begins to loose it’s power of us.  For in reality the biggest fear of all, is Death or an ending of being.  I do not like pain, I do not like hunger, I do not like hatred, I do not like oppression, but most of all I do not like fear.  For fear is the soul eater; it paralyzes us and slows our ability to rationalize and problem solve.  Releasing Fears hold over us, does not mean we give up, give in and do nothing.  In fact it often brings about the opposite.  When we release the power Fear has over us, we step forward like a true warrior and say “Fuck that, this is not my reality.”  We may still have difficulties to face, and hardships to overcome.  But we are no longer weak, weary and downtrodden.  We step into our power and then, oh then…we can achieve wonders.

How can we make changes and face our fear?

First of all take a moment to sit with your fears.  Think about what they truly are, follow them through a line of questioning “And then what?”.  Once you are aware of the things you fear most, ask yourself how being afraid is helping you solve those problems.  Then ask yourself what you can do to change the situation.  I know many of you are at this moment saying “I have not control over the things I fear”.  That is true.  We are living in a world filled with chaos, change, and destruction.  But we are also living in a world filled with Lovers, healers, and magic makers.

When we turn on the news, radio, and internet, we may miss the lovers & healers.  We can’t always hear them over the clamber of the Fear Mongers, but they are out there.  I know my social media is filled with them.  I hear the comments, & posts of the Lovers and Healers.  They are the ones speaking up and saying “This aggression will not stand man!” (Big Lewbowski love).  I often wonder why we don’t see all the beautiful, loving, things that are happening in the World?  Why are we not seeing those things on TV, and the the Internet.  Why?  Because Fear sells.  It’s a fact folks.  When we are afraid, we go looking for that something, something that will take away the fear.  If we fear for our safety, we need to go buy security systems, guns, and alarms.  When we fear we will not have enough, we need to go buy more stuff so we have stockpiles in  case we need it.  Don’t believe me?  Stop by the local grocery store, when the weather report has announced an expected storm.  People are in there stocking up, like they expect a Zombie Apocalypse.

The lessons I have learned from the Dead about Fear, is that it doesn’t matter worth shit.  You can live your life filled with fear, hiding your light from the world & your still going to die.  You can also live your life out loud, choosing to be fully alive & you are still going to die.  But what changes is way in which you live and the growth of your Spirit.  Nothing is gained by fear.  But oh, there is so much that is gained when we open up to Love.

Love allows us to connect with the world around us.  It allows us to step forward and support our neighbors when they are in need, and it allows us to experience the beauty this world has to offer.  Love does not ask us to lie down and cower, it asks us to step up and do the right thing.  To boldly express the gift that we are to the world.  Love asks us to shine, and share our light with the world.

I choose LOVE…each and every day, I choose LOVE.  I am a Spiritual Warrior, and I am not afraid of hardship.  I do not call it to me, nor do I run from it.  I understand, that as a human being I have come into this incarnation to make a change for the better.  Yes we are living in hard times, but we are here for a reason.  We are powerful, and when we release fear; we give ourselves permission to step up and make the world around us a better place.  The first step to doing this is to choose LOVE over Fear.  Remember you never truly walk alone.  You have a whole team of Spirits walking in your shadow.

spreading love-salicrow

Stories of Spirit…Finding Love after Death

Today, I sat with a husband and wife who love each other very much; the husband is a Spirit now.  The love between them is still strong, even though he left this world over 5 years ago.  When we truly love someone, not even death can detract from the bond.  In many ways; I believe it is fair to say death strengthens love.  We find forgiveness; for the petty little things, we grieve lost time, and we review every moment shared; with a kind of nostalgia reserved for Death, alone.

I find it an honor to sit with couples, separated by Death.  I get to experience love for another human being, so quickly and so clearly.  By connecting to Spirits; I get to share in their deep emotions, and through them; I know what it is like to love their partners.  I also know the deep feeling of loss, and the desire to comfort; they also feel.  Often Spirits feel moved to encourage the one they love; to move on & find someone else to love.  Often that suggestion comes too soon, for the living partner.

When we are the one left living; our Beloved passed into Spirit, the sheer act of living often seems overwhelming.  The flood of emotions, threatens to drown us, and we often wish we were dreaming; soon to wake, with life back to normal.  With time, we find balance.  Our footing gets stronger as months pass, reaching milestones; their birthday, our birthday, Christmas, anniversaries, and finally the day of their death.  For most people the first year after loosing one’s Beloved, goes by in a blur of emotions and paperwork.  Going out socially; connecting to the world is difficult.  But again, time passes and our wounds begin to heal, our heart starts to mend.  There is no specific amount of time, appropriate for mourning.  Mourning is personal, and takes as much time as it takes.

One thing I do know; is that when we are stuck in mourning, unable to move on…our Beloved Dead remains by our side.  It is often the goal of the partner in Spirit, to help heal their living loved one.  Healing & moving on, does not have to mean finding another partner; but it does mean allowing yourself the possibility.  Most people want companionship, they want to have a special someone they can confide in, and share life’s memories with and our Beloved Dead want us to have it.

I am always reminding people, that if they were the one who had passed first…they would want their Beloved to find partnership again.  The problem is we often forget to grant it to ourselves.  Somehow we feel that it is more noble for us to stay alone, to honor them and stay connected to them.  But in reality, they do not leave us because we find another love.  In many ways, love is much less complicated when we no longer have a body and basic needs to fulfill.  We can understand that as souls we have the capability to love more then one person.  In every day life, it is not that easy; life and emotions often make it difficult to open our hearts to multiple lovers.  But in death, there we have a broader view, and a deeper understanding of what it all means.  Now that does not mean we have it all figured out, it simply means those pesky, rules of engagement are not as strict.

When we find love for another, after the death of our partner; our heart expands to love more then one.  We do not love our Beloved Dead less, instead we learn that love is infinite.

I also would like to point out, that being a widow or widower has it’s own kind of power to it.  It’s like you are given a free pass, to continue loving your past, while engaging in a loving relationship with your present.  Not many people get to publicly admit to loving someone other then their current partner.  When most relationships end, we kind of zip up the remains and stash them in the do not talk about corner of our life.  It’s not considered polite to reminisce over the fun things you did with your ex.  But, when your partner dies; they are never your ex.  They are your past, but it is granted that they will always remain part of your life.

If you are fortunate enough to find true love a second time; rejoice, and know that your Beloved Dead is rejoicing with you.  They want you to live your life fully, not seal yourself up in a tomb waiting to die.  Remember time is not the same for the Dead, as it is for the Living.  Years to us, can go by in a blink of the eye when we are Spirit bound.  Do not let your life go by without you, as you wait to join your Beloved in Spirit.  Live fully, giving honor to the life you shared with them and the joy of love itself.  I hope you enjoyed the read Folks.

spreading love-salicrow

Stories of Spirit…Healing the Heart of a Soldier [self forgiveness & spirit communication]

When I was 8 years old, I stumbled across an old, forgotten chest in my grandparents house, while searching for hiding places.  The chest was tucked away in the attic space above the attached shed, a place no one ever went to.  In fact; I am pretty sure I was not suppose to be there…but I was.  Finding the chest & being the snoopy, investigative sort; I opened it to explore the contents, & see if I could fit inside.  The chest was relatively empty, filled with little bits of nothing, and a few odd letters.  One of the letters, changed my view of the world and the way that I looked at my father forever… It was a letter he had written to my Grandmother, from Vietnam.

Opening the steamer trunk was an Exceptional Moment of Spirit for me; one in which the world stood still, marking my soul for the rest of this life.

The letter was written for the benefit of the receiver, with his hardships and emotional turmoil minimized, so as not to worry her.  But being Psychic I could feel it, I remember reading the letter as if my father were speaking the words out loud; I could feel and hear the emotion, unsaid in his voice filled with fear and unease.  The piece that struck me hardest, and has stuck with me throughout my life; was when he told her he would be sending his paycheck home, & that he believed it was enough money for the refrigerator the family desperately needed.

My Dad (back row), age 13?

My father was raised by his Grandmother (Grammy Brown).  She was a powerful woman; a psychic, medium and medicine woman, who made her living selling worms & helping people with their problems.  Being raised in this environment and having gifts himself, my father was an energetically sensitive person…in many ways, one far to sensitive for the experiences of war.  But poverty is a strong persuader…so he lied about his age, and joined the Marines at 17…a boy going off to fight for his country, unaware that he would someday be fighting for his soul.

Two years before my father passed away, his healing path through Spirit truly began.  While home visiting, he asked me if he could watch me do a Seance.  At first I said no, and explained that it was a personal experience for the family hosting the Seance.  Then Spirit stepped in to make it happen…the next day, a client of mine called and asked if there was any way I could see a friend of hers from out of town.  It was a day I didn’t normally work, but agreed as long as my father could sit in on the session and simply watch.  That moment with Spirit rocked his world; opening his heart, and reawakening his own Spiritual gifts.

Over the next two years he spent a lot of time exploring his beliefs and fears of the Spirit world, with my sister and I.  He feared who would be waiting for him there, for he witnessed and committed many acts of violence, during his time in Vietnam…acts that haunted his soul, and caused him to fear what was waiting for him.  One of the biggest misconceptions he had to face; was that the Spirits of those he had killed did not hate him, and were not waiting to serve vengeance.  I explained to him that war and murder do not hold the same level of karmic debt.  I asked him if he were the one to have died in war, would he be hateful to the person responsible for his death….his answer is “NO”.

It had never occurred to me before that moment; that the scars left on the soul of a soldier, could leave them believing they were deserving of haunting.

My father was lucky; he found soul healing at the end of his life, and made peace with the Demons of his mind.  By exploring the world of Spirit; through communication and journey-work, he was able to forgive himself.  I must say, he was brave and dedicated to the task of healing; spending many hours reviewing the path he had walked and seeking guidance from his Ancestors and guides.  But still, the gateway to his healing came from changing roles with those he had wronged; by asking himself if he would haunt his slayer, if he had been the one to die.  Through this he was able to find peace.

In his death my father is forever an advocate of the Wounded Soldier (physically/mentally).  To this day, I know when a client I see is a Veteran before they sit down in front of me.  I know this because my Dad shows up to tell me “this one’s mine kid”.  Which tells me that they are carrying the wounds of war, that so identified the man my father was.  Forgiveness of self, is the hardest thing anyone who has experienced war must do.  It begins with exchanging roles with those you have wronged, and asking yourself if you hold a personal vendetta against the soldiers you faced.  It also requires that we look at the reasons we chose to walk the path of the warrior…for many, the decision comes out of duty, honor, and responsibility.  These things are not the making of a monster.

 

Whether soldiers or not, we all may find healing by practicing self forgiveness.  I hope you enjoyed the read.

spreading love-salicrow

Stories of Spirit…Love is Good Stuff [be the change you want to see in the world]

People often refer to me, as an optimist, and I suppose that is true.  That being said; I am not blinded to the plight, humanity is facing in this time of tremendous change.  To be an optimist, does mean we stick our head in the sand & wait for all the bad stuff to go away.  It means; we choose to embrace the goodness of life, to tune ones vibration into the beauty, kindness, and joy, that life has to offer.  Being an optimist is a choice, one that starts with a simple mindset…

Be the Change you want to see in the World. -Mahatma Gandhi

Seeing myself as co-creator, of my life and world; I live by the this motto.  I often say, that ‘God does not help the lazy‘.  This is not in reference to bumming around in our jammies, or wanting a simple life.  But more a way of saying; that we are responsible for our own happiness.  In life attitude is everything; for we all face hardships, each and every one of us.  And, yes it is true; some people have far more hardships then others.  But, that does not mean our struggles are insubstantial, because someone has it worst then we do.  How we choose to experience those hardships, is what makes us who we are; better or bitter.

I chose LOVE, a long time ago.  I am not sure when, or if it even happened in this life time.  But, the truth of the matter is I chose to love the world around me, and the people in it; including myself.  That does not mean, I like everyone. What it means is I choose to be kind.  I choose to be compassionate, and as a general rule, I spread love around, as often as possible.  In doing so, the world loves me back.  For, genuine compassion and caring, is often responded to with….NEWS FLASH…compassion and caring.  That’s right folks, what we give to the world, returns back to us.

Love is not limited to the intimate relationships of partners, parents, children, & siblings.  It is something that should be shared with all, and often.  It cost nothing, not a single cent; to be kind.

I find myself talking about love today, as the old ‘Red Heart Holiday’, is just around the corner.  Valentines Day, in my opinion is a Hallmark Holiday.  It is a way for Greeting Card companies, Florist, and Chocolate makers; to get a bit of a boost to their income.  It is also a holiday, that makes many people feel like shit.  Simply, for the reason that they do not have a partner.  Hell, they may be perfectly happy with that decision 364 days of the year, but on Valentines Day; they are reminded that they are among the ‘partner-less’.  Which some how translates to unlovable.  But we must remember…love is limitless.

I propose that we start a revolution of LOVE.  That we collectively, choose Valentines Day, as a day to dedicate ourselves to LOVE.  Now, I am not asking you to picket the streets with banners and megaphones; declaring your love for the world (although, that would truly be an awesome sight).  Instead, I am asking you to make a pledge to yourself; to share kindness & compassion, with yourself and others.  It is amazing, how much a simple truthful compliment, can effect others.  If you see an old lady wearing a smashing hat…say something.  If you notice, the hard work your neighbor has put into their yard…say something.  Buy an extra can or two of soup, when your out grocery shopping and drop it by the local Food Bank.  Take 5 minutes out of your day, to talk to the lonely, old-guy; standing behind you at the post office. Look people in the eyes, look into their souls, and for a brief moment…share love.

While we are on the subject of sharing LOVE.  I would like to point out the most important, starting place LOVE….ourselves.  We must learn to love ourselves.

I believe the brain, is like a super computer.  And, like a computer…it can be effected by bad programming and viruses.  No child; new and fresh to this world, hates them self.  That is a fact!  The hate, and disapproval, we lavishly smear upon ourselves, was created by an outside force.  The voice of an un-approving parent, a harsh teacher, or mean spirited peers; first created the negative language we speak to ourselves.  Over the years, their voices fade, & our brain starts repeating the insults, in our own voice.  When we repetitively spew hate at ourselves, we begin to own it.

One of the most powerful truths, I hold…is that I love myself.  I truly do.  Perhaps that is the secret to being an optimist; self love.  Self love, can be learned.  But it takes patience and dedication (back to God/Goddess not helping the lazy).  Our dedication to love, needs to include ourselves.  We need to speak kindly to ourselves; acknowledge our strengths and show compassion for our weaknesses.

Here is my go-to, Self-Love Generator.

Every day, spend 5 minutes looking at yourself in the mirror.  Eye contact is crucial, so this is not a scanning for blemishes, pinching our belly-fat, cursing our hair kind of exercise.  In fact, it is completely the opposite.

As you stand in front of the mirror, connect with yourself; through looking deeply into your eyes.

Now, say something nice about yourself.  I don’t care what it is, but it must be truthful.  “I am good with children”, “I have a great voice”,  “I am have beautiful eyes”, “I am a dedicated partner”.

Notice, that the statements were made in the affirmative, with a focus on eye contact.  This is crucial, as most damage/bad programming, come through statements that were made to us…declaring we were something.  Many times these negative statements, were also made with eye contact.  Our eyes are portals to our soul.  Powerful healing can take place, when we use these portals (eyes), for positive programming.  This exercise is meant to be done often; like daily…for weeks.  But remember, it only takes 5 minutes.  I will not lie to you, it is very hard to do.  I have recommended this exercise to many of my clients over the years; and they all come back telling me how hard it was to do.  In the beginning, you will most likely struggle, with kind things to say to yourself.  But after awhile, you will find the truth & recognize just how amazing you really are.

Well, there is my rant on love, optimism and change.  I hope you take the time this Valentines day, to start a Love Revolution, in your own life.  I also hope, that you find it in you to spread love, wherever you go.  Can you imagine how awesome the world would be; if we all chose to be compassionate, kind and loving.  I hope you enjoyed the read Folks.

spreading love-salicrow